Thursday, May 28, 2009

She Doesn't Need To Shut Up, She Actually Puts Up


In this world that we were born into, in this life we've been given, we come to recognize that it is made up of a strange and frightening combination of fragile, strong, evil, love, light and dark.

We come forth and are thrust into this jumble of madness and told to make sense of it all. To experience, but not this or that. To love, but them not those. To take it, but not too much. To give, but to those who deserve.

It's not a clear picture, and there are roads that lead to destinations that are dark and life rattling. Where you become your environment, and it has a hold of you entirely. It all but makes you life's bitch.

If you're lucky something else happens. Something wonderful and just as troubling. Something even harder than sinking to that dark place that you struggled to get to in the beginning.

You recover.

So what happens then? What happens when you've been to the bottom and you lift yourself, fighting tooth and nail, hand over hand to the top again.

This happens.

The Melindaville Blog washed over me and held me close. Her words wrapped around me like a soft, warm blanket. What is The Melindaville Blog about? In her own words:

My name is Melinda Roberts Tyler and many people have told me I have had a fascinating life. In my lifetime, I have been a professional actor and musician, worked as an exotic dancer and high priced call girl, as well as started the world's first fantasy phone call service. I was a member of San Francisco's punk rock scene of the 1980's, performing with the band, "Wild Women of Borneo," during which time I became a hard-core heroin addict. I recovered from addiction in the mid-1990's and became an honors college student, a fully funded doctoral student, and an award-winning professor of psychology. I am currently writing a detailed account of my life experiences in a memoir, whose working title is "Lost and Found: A Journey." My purpose is to tell my story to inspire others if they desire change in their own lives and to increase awareness about the need for free and available treatment in our society.

I could sit here and nitpick about little things like using the word 'blog' in the title, or the crowded sidebar with unnecessary items like the calendar. I could harp about how far you have to scroll down to get to the archives. I could slap Melinda on the hand for saying "dye their hair" instead of exclaiming that wild women COLOR their hair as I learned in hair school. But, then I would be the world's largest douche bag.

Melinda takes you on her journey and when she tells the tale, you are right there in the room with her. Right there in the hotel room as a call girl. You are sitting beside her in her lonely little apartment, infested with cockroaches and library books. She takes you on the path of her recovery without seeming whiny or self-obsessed.

I thank Melinda for asking us for a review, but I have to decline. I cannot review you, Melinda, because simply enough:








Instead? What I want to do is sing your praises and share your words with the world. Melinda is the type of person who doesn't just sit around, telling you how to make the world a better place and change lives. She actually changes lives.

141 comments:

  1. WOW what an amazing story she has to tell. She is someone I will follow. How nice that you didn't nitpick her just based on the amazing person she is.

    That says a lot about your character ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Being 20+ years in recovery myself, I'm always leery when I realize I've clicked onto the blog of another recovering addict. Mostly because I've seen way too much writing about addiction that comes off like repeating a bunch of feel good affirmations in one's head can cure anything.
    Do those things help? I suppose. But what I like more is when someone digs right back into their dirty and degrading past and calls it what it is.
    Keep writing Melinda. It's beautiful what you're doing.
    And thank you, V.VonDoom, for 'getting it'.

    ReplyDelete
  3. She is just so OPEN. I love her brutal honesty. I'm definitely going to start reading this blog. In fact, this is the type of blog that I will dig into the archives. Great review. Her experiences and willingness to talk about them definitely earns her a pass on some of those little things.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've only read a few posts. I'm in awe. She is a very strong woman. She really does have an amazing story. I don't know what else to say. Wow. I'm going to add her to my list as well.

    ReplyDelete
  5. These blogs make it all worthwhile, don't they? Nicely done, Viv. I've added Melinda to my reader, and I can't wait to dig in.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I lived with someone who had been in recovery for 13 years. Only to have him slip away two weeks after I left him.

    Melinda got me, she really did.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I swear you motherfuckers are trying to make a woman out of me. I always put a high price on people like Melinda, mostly because you really can't make a person tell you anything personal anymore, nothing honest or even somewhat insightful without getting vague, lifeless, plug-and-play statements. I have a great deal of respect for people that can be open about their mistakes, and honest with themselves about where they are now.

    Gah. I'm so getting Lifetime and Oxygen blocked when I get my cable set up.

    Melinda, I'm a big fucking pussy for your blog. That's all there is to it. Biscotti?

    ReplyDelete
  8. It's nice to be able to add something with substance to my Reader today!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ghost, you big sissy you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sarah: easy, I still have my testicles.

    FF: um, does the tampon come with a side of chocolate? I know how you bitches love chocolate. And Wesson Oil.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sarah: I don't know, open your eyes real quick.

    ReplyDelete
  12. ha! I'm just playin with ya.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sarah: So am I, seriously, I'm sorta rusty on my teabagging technique.

    ReplyDelete
  14. lol its easy, all in the knees.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hold on, I'm trying to figure out where this stupid tampon goes.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Back when I was in college, I got to know one of my professors very well. We spent a lot of time together because I tutored students in her lower level classes hoping to get a stellar recommendation from her for law school. As I got to know her she revealed to me that she had grown up in the south, gotten pregnant at 15 by a physically abusive boyfriend. When her mom told her she was going to marry said boyfriend whether she wanted to or not, she ran away-just up and left the state. She got a job, had the baby, went on welfare, managed to get her ged, go to college, finish college that was partially funded by loans and grants and she worked(under the table b/c it would have lowered her state benefits)she then put herself through grad school and got her phd. I look at people like her, strangely her name is Melinda also, and this Melinda and think, how can some people do it, against so many odds and obstacles.

    I am in awe of people who can conquer and change their circumstances like this.

    ReplyDelete
  17. ok, good luck with that Ghost. I'm off to bake Pumpkin Muffins.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Eh, this is too much work. I don't have the right equipment.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Dammit, dammit, dammit!!! Another I fucking love you?!?! What is it with the quality blogs this week. Oh who am I kidding. I love it when there are great blogs reviewed here. Farging bastages.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I love when lurkers come out from their caves. I always feel like I need to disrobe them. It's ok, Lil, I just lit some candles, let's have a chat. Biscotti?

    ReplyDelete
  21. Ghost, get off of her.

    Jeez, you're all wound up today.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Right. Sorry, Lil, where are my manners?

    ReplyDelete
  23. Well, I'm definitely going to start reading her blog. But what I don't know is, I mean...

    Hers is the kind of blog that sparks arguments and conversational threads that require actual logical perception, which is fantastic. Love that...and she responds in kind.

    I've really, really, really got to admire her for not taking the route of completely derogating herself to make it easier.

    ReplyDelete
  24. A candlelit chat with Ghost? I'm not that brave. And your manners - maybe they're with the biscotti? ;-) Venturing out of the cave and into the comment stream is quite the big step around here so please do not mock my amazing accomplishment.

    Thanks for the help, Betsey.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Anytime, Lil.

    Ghost means well and all. He just smells fresh meat.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Lil, I wasn't mocking you, trust me. I just have a strange way of welcoming new commenters.

    ReplyDelete
  27. It's a true story. When he humps your leg it's like a big hug. A big hug that just keeps happening over and over and over.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ghost has a strange way of doing a lot, I'm guessing. But I really think he was welcoming you Lil.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Gok - I agree that it's hard to find people willing to really "go there" and be honest about their shit.

    ReplyDelete
  30. By the way, I was joking about the mocking of my "major achievement". Sorry, it's easy to forget that how I'm hearing what I'm typing in my head doesn't always come across when I hit the publish button.

    Plus, there are all these other voices in my head clamoring for attention so, you know, that can make it difficult sometimes. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  31. Oh that is just Ghost whispering in your ear.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Wow, I go away for a couple of hours to find I missed out on talking about leg humping, teabagging and tampons. Dammit, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  33. And apparently amazing accomplishment and major achievement are actually the same words, yet not. Bah. I really should go back and see what the hell I wrote before I write more crap that only shows that I don't pay attention and oooh, was that a chicken?

    ReplyDelete
  34. mmmmm. New leg. Yeah, I'm a big freak. Don't worry Fox, there's more to come. Yeah, I went there.

    ReplyDelete
  35. I've always been flattered when people hump my leg. I really don't understand why we can't greet people like that all the time. I would also like to say, anal leakage. Because it makes me laugh. Just like kumquat and mangina.

    ReplyDelete
  36. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  37. I really liked her view on prostitution. How it should be regulated and legalized. Makes me think of Firefly and how they have companions.

    ReplyDelete
  38. They really should legalize it. I think you'd see a lot less violence and a lot more leghumping. Shiny happy people all over the place.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Legalize the green stuff first. Lot more peace after that.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Thanny: No. Have you seen what the government has done with tobacco? Trust me, you DO NOT want pot legalized.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I think marijuana needs to be de-criminalized, if anything.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Two blogs fill my reader, LB's blog and now this one. I love strong, self-realized women who dry hump life into the ground.

    ReplyDelete
  43. It doesn't make sense to me. They should legalize it. They know it's going on. It will always happen. There would be so many benefits from legalizing prostitution. Especially for the men and women who go into the trade. They have rights like everyone else, so why are we not protecting them. The world makes no sense to me. everything seems so backwards.

    Move to Canada, the green stuff is practically legal here. :D

    ReplyDelete
  44. Yeah, legalization will create a whole bunch of red tapism related problems. Decriminalization is the way to go, you can't pack people of to jail for something comparatively trivial. That's why I like living where I live.

    ReplyDelete
  45. I really don't think prostitution will be legalized in any of our lifetimes. No way the right wingers will let that go.

    And even if they do, I don't know if the girls in the trade will get treated more humanely. They may get rights (401k? Dental?) but they'll still be treated like objects.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Decriminalization is the way to go. I'd be pretty pissed if I had to pay taxes on my weed. If that ever happened, it would be the only time stoners would get organized and do something, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  47. You never know. It may be legalized. Way into the future, I'm sure. A lot of people never thought they would see gay marriage legalized in their lifetime and look at the places where it is legal. You just never know.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Whoa. Um, yes, objectified, but really? You don't have to be a prostitute to be objectified, people.

    ReplyDelete
  49. I agree. You certainly do not need to be a prostitute to be objectified. It happens everyday to many people who arent.

    ReplyDelete
  50. I think 'being objectified' probably isn't a real moral crisis when you're fucking for money. They should have health care, they should have benefits.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Agreed! They should enjoy all of the benefits other workers enjoy.

    ReplyDelete
  52. They do, in the Netherlands.

    ReplyDelete
  53. What gets me is that porn is legal. Why not prostitution? The only difference I see is that prostitutes fuck off camera. Now I'm not sure as to what porn actors are entitled to, but shouldn't prostitutes have the same thing. Just throwing it out there, not sure if I'm making any sense, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  54. I see what you're saying Foxy. I guess the difference is people pay to watch sex...not have it?

    ReplyDelete
  55. Obviously there is an age factor as well. I'm sure there are lots of prostitutes that are under 18, which if it were legalized there wouldn't be teenagers out on the street.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Well love, disgusting as it may be...there is child pornography out there. People still make and buy it, even though its illegal.

    ReplyDelete
  57. I get the argument about healthcare, but I have a feeling that women that get objectified in the flesh trade get treated a lot worse than the rest of them. That more percentage of prostitutes get kicked around that regular women do. And no matter how much of legal support they get, they'll still get treated like shit and the unmentionables of a society.

    Sure, they're fucking for money but I'm guessing they wouldn't mind being treated just a little better (from their clients and "employers") - something legalization can't change. Not that it's an argument against legalization, but meh, nothing's going to change.

    Helplessness is the flavor of my week.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Seriously, I've always been an amateur in the field of fucking for things, but those things are usually intangibles and I wouldn't consider it my profession. I will profess to offering a wide variety of industrial grade services, but I wouldn't go so far as to charge money or work for a pimp, I enjoy fucking. I think people that take on fucking as a career should be taken seriously in certain regards. They should have benefits, but call it what it is. Think of it like this:

    You eat at a restaurant, you compliment the chef on a job well done. But would you invite him back to your place for a night cap and a toss in the hay? Probably not. You appreciate him for what he does, but he is a chef. He presents himself as such and takes on all the bad things that come with the job. You see him, you say he's a chef he makes great meals, I like his food. Would you engage him in a discussion of nuclear physics? No. To you, he is a chef. Not a scholar, a chef. Everyone to some degree is objectified in some way. Make me a cheeseburger, bitch. Suck my cock, bitch. Tell me that people shouldn't be objectified. Bullshit. I feel a free love moment coming on.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Pornographers have been busted for pandering and prostitution before. Porn is just so "mainstream" now that it's easy to forget when pornographers were persecuted. Hell, look at Hefner and Flint and their troubles with the mail.

    ReplyDelete
  60. This is true. And if I had an AK47 and a flame thrower with a multitude of other weapons. I would hunt them all down vigilante style. When things like that exist, it just makes me real sad for humanity. I end up asking myself why, why are people like this, and I never find the answer.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Yes, but as it is now, they are doing illegal things as well. they have no legal recourse. Were it legalized they would have more rights. They wouldnt have to put up with the abuse.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Also, that's not to say I don't have respect for their line of work, but there is a reason you would pay a chef, a prostitute, a garbage man. Because they do the things that you and I can't, or don't want to do ourselves.

    ReplyDelete
  63. My pseudo-ex the chef would snicker to be discussed alongside a prostitute and a garbageman. Food, sex, and waste.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Right, GoK. Sure, no one's going to engage a prostitute in a conversation about the strength of the Euro but as long as they're not kicked in the side of the head I'm guessing they'll call it a good day at the office.

    Perhaps I have this wrong, but I think of prostitutes living in hazy parts of town, shooting up and getting beaten by pimps and clients alike and if that is the case I don't see legalization changing much.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Um, you could also think of drug dealers in the same sense, but it's not true, Thanny. Not all whores live in the slums. Set up a labor cost that's accepted across the board, benefits packages and now you have lower middle class America. Also, legalization would hold the New Pimps to conduct standards, just like any business owner.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Thanny, if it was legalized the pimps/Johns wouldnt be able to beat and torture them without in turn being arrested and having charges brought up on them. As it stands, these women who chose to be in the prostitution profession, cant do a damn thing about it. They cant go to the police and say "this man I sold myself to for the evening beat me within an inch of my life" because they would be arrested as well.
    As for the drugs, well I guess thats a personal choice.
    But I think prostitution would be a lot less dirty and scary if it wasnt illegal. If these women got the health care they need. If they didnt have to deal with being raped and sodomized, maybe things with the drugs would change? I dunno...I feel like I'm talking out of my ass right now.

    ReplyDelete
  67. I haven't checked out the blog yet, but since I trust you guys so much, I'm adding it to my reader. I will say, VV, the review rocks.

    As far as prostitution goes I generally feel the same as previously mentioned, that objectification happens all over the damn place. Prostitution just fetishizes objectification. Objectifies objectification, if you will. What the fuck am I talking about?

    ReplyDelete
  68. I'm with Ghost and Sarah on that one.

    I agree about the drug thing. I'm sure one of the main reasons they do the drugs is to forget and numb the pain of having to deal with their clients and the abuse they receive.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Not all whores live in the slumsAh, you can say that again.

    But yeah, legalization will definitely help.

    Although, given my general dim view of humanity, don't see that happening.

    ReplyDelete
  70. That, and the fact they really are completely helpless. If a client rapes a prostitute, those women have to live with that. There is no help for them. No police, no therapy. They turn to drugs and get addicted.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Chefs are food whores!

    ReplyDelete
  72. Sweeping generalizations are all the rage these days.

    ReplyDelete
  73. You fuckers were hiding all the good shit and giving me spoilt Indians.

    Bastards.

    The blog seems to be the real deal.

    ReplyDelete
  74. Speaking of whores, hey Gene!

    ReplyDelete
  75. Cops are crime whores.

    Im done now

    ReplyDelete
  76. There are so many posts on her blog that made me cry. I want to read every word. That's going to take me awhile.

    ReplyDelete
  77. So Chris, are Doctors health whores?

    ReplyDelete
  78. Editors are punctuation whores.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Also, as the Ambassador of Most Things Anal, I must speak on behalf of Sodomy. Sodomy has received harsh criticism over the years for being 'wrong', 'unholy', and even 'barbaric'. I would like to take this opportunity to clarify that Forced Sodomy is the culprit and should be charged as such. Sodomy was an innocent, no matter how unorthodoxed Sodomy may or may not be, Sodomy is a kind and caring citizen and looks to further serve the community and my fiancee. That is all.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Ghost is a butt whore.

    ReplyDelete
  81. Sarah, I prefer 'Anal Ambassador'.

    ReplyDelete
  82. potato, pah-tah-toe. Or something.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Sarah, yes.

    My point is, and may I say it was deftly argued, we are all whores in some way.

    Why should I get health and a sweet 401k for leg-humping a sale for my company when Glitter or Mercedes get
    the shaft. (No pun)

    ReplyDelete
  84. Rimjob? Can't pronounce that any differently.

    ReplyDelete
  85. I dont care if it was intended or not...you said shaft. Heh. Ok, I'm done.

    I agree Chris. We're all just big Whores. Some are higher paid than others, but in the end...whores.

    In the end...heh.

    ReplyDelete
  86. So what you're saying Ghost, is you're a rimjob whore?

    ReplyDelete
  87. Delurking long enough to just say, "Wow".

    Between this and Toukakoukan, I think I'll be doing a lot of interesting "catch up" reading over the next few days. Really fascinating stuff.

    Dashing back under my rock, now. But thanks for the great find. :)

    ReplyDelete
  88. I'm a customer service whore.

    I'm also a boob whore. My boobs love my new coconut body butter. Slathering goodness for the win.

    ReplyDelete
  89. Hey--I want to thank you for the great review! I'm already seeing more traffic on my blog--which is much appreciated.

    So glad I didn't get a 'meh!'

    Melinda

    ReplyDelete
  90. Mel, I freakin love you on most levels and a few I just made up.

    Which is odd as I hate most people and loath myself.

    Your blog rocked my face off(Not the John Travolta/Nick Cage movie)

    ReplyDelete
  91. Hey, hey...the Meh isnt that bad. I mean, its not great, but its not awful. I got a Meh. Its the flaming fingers and the short bus ya gotta watch out for.

    ReplyDelete
  92. Dude, I'm sorry, but I seriously, seriously, seriously doubt that some fuckjob who's willing to smack a girl around is going to care whether or not he can be legally prosecuted for abusing an employee.

    Yes, conditions for prostitutes would probably clean up if it were legal. But I highly, highly, highly doubt those women would be more accepted and respected by the rest of society just because their job were legal - if anything, it would cause even harsher response from the zealots.

    Either way, seriously?

    In my head, prostitution is dehumanizing as fuck, whether it's legal or not. It's not empowering to be valued for nothing other than having a point of entry.

    ReplyDelete
  93. Rass: do you respect or hold in high esteem, garbagemen? Septic truck operators? Lawyers?

    ReplyDelete
  94. All I'm saying is, first? We need to work on the stigma that prostitutes are tools.

    ReplyDelete
  95. And: My dad was a garbage man.

    ReplyDelete
  96. Legalization has nothing to do with reinventing the public's perception. If it did, then we're talking about total mindfucking. I'm not saying it'll make saints out of whores, I'm saying it will improve their way of life.

    ReplyDelete
  97. I know it has nothing to do with public perception, but I viewing prostitutes as toys is why people treat them as such.

    ReplyDelete
  98. But the problem is, half the reason people go to prostitutes is to have something to play with.

    ReplyDelete
  99. Look, I'm not criticizing these professions, I'm just calling them what they are. I respect the work they do, because hey, that's a job I don't want to do. I'm glad someone will work the sewers, take care of garbage, fuck my high school principal. But let's not get things all twisted and try to romanticize, sugar coat, or lie about the reality of these jobs. And Rass, people go to prostitutes mostly because they can't get anyone to play with what they themselves have.

    ReplyDelete
  100. I know I'm not likely to change my stance on this. One of my best friends was a call girl for about six years.

    It's actually scary how similar she is to this woman: ex-call girl, in a band, she's now going to college at 26.

    Basically, after being friends with her? I wouldn't wish that shit on anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  101. I mean really, if you want a house built the right way, you don't go to a fucking engineering student. You go to the pros. A blowjob is no different. You go to the pros because they know what they are doing and will produce what you desire.

    ReplyDelete
  102. Yeah, but your house isn't going to have suicidal tendency due to lack of self-worth.

    ReplyDelete
  103. Rassles, I'm not attacking your friend, but we really can't have an honest discussion about this because of our human shortcomings. Your friend went through some unimaginable shit. I get that but I'm afraid anything I say to the contrary will come off as insensitive and cruel. So, let's bake something.

    ReplyDelete
  104. I was really, really, really trying not to join in on this conversation.

    ReplyDelete
  105. There's just different levels of prostitution. Drug-addicted whores sucking cock for crack? I don't know that legalization is going to help them all that much. They need more help than a 401K and a health plan. I mean, there are services available to some of these people already and they don't use them. (I'm not saying there's a lot of services, but there are some social welfare/outreach programs). But mid-level/high class prostitutes - legalization would probably help, if only to keep them out of jail for earning a living. What they do is hard work that I could never do. I have to agree with Rassles, though. Prostitution is inherently dehumanizing. I don't care how much those chicks at the Bunny Ranch try to act like they're all emotionally and psychologically healthy. They call that asshole pimp Dennis Hoff Daddy and then fuck him. What is healthy about that?

    ReplyDelete
  106. True, Rass, but anyone can have suicidal tendencies. I tried killing myself last year. And I'm not a hooker. Everyone's problems are just as big and real to them as yours, or your friends issues are to each of you. And the house could still have structural issues regardless of who built it.

    ReplyDelete
  107. The day I met Eli? Ready for this?

    Our bands are playing at the same venue. I have to go to the bathroom, and Eli's standing there putting on make up.

    "You're Rassles, right? I recognize you from Myspace."

    "Yeah I am. And you're..."

    "Eli."

    "Nice to meet you."

    Silence.

    "Man, I fucking hate this bar. The first time I sucked dick for money was in that stall, right there," and she points, then goes back to her make up. "God, I miss being sixteen."

    ReplyDelete
  108. I love that story. I would blog about Eli, but I don't know if she'd like it.

    ReplyDelete
  109. A number of my clients are exotic dancers, and I used to have a client who was in porn but she dropped out of site. Every single one of them was damaged. If they didn't start out with a drug problem eventually they ended up with one. I think Mel said it so well that people who are sexually abused just don't view their sexuality the same. Not everyone goes out and sells it but I do think it fundamentally changes something in you. Good for you Mel for reaching out to some of these women.

    ReplyDelete
  110. You're right about that, Gok.

    ReplyDelete
  111. Here's the way I see it: It's not going away. We can educate and sensitize and rehabilitate 'til the cows come home, but there are still going to be prostitutes.

    Even in some long-distant enlightened age where we're all peaceful and self-actualized, I think we're still going to have prostitution. So maybe it'll be an android or a virtual reality space bot. Whatever. People are going to pay for what they can't/won't/shouldn't ask for in their daily lives.

    So, the question then becomes, to me at least, how to make something potentially destructive less so? Moral legislation and criminalization hasn't worked, so let's try something else.

    ReplyDelete
  112. I can agree that people that go into playing skins for a living are probably much more damaged than most. But I think everyone on this earth is pretty well damaged to all hell. That's ok, it's how you deal with it.

    ReplyDelete
  113. Decriminalizing and regulating prostitution would have its benefits. It seems counterproductive to regulate something that is so dehumanizing but it's probably worse to say well we don't like it so we are not going to sanction it therefore these girls are off our radar.

    Along with health screening could also come mental health screening, access to drug rehab and support for women looking for a way out be it financial, educational helping them connect with resources.

    You can decriminalize without it meaning you think this is just another career option for women.

    ReplyDelete
  114. FF - well said. It's similar to how I feel about drugs. People are going to use drugs whether they are legal or not. Drugs are criminalized because abusing them is not considered a healthy, proper choice in life. But criminalizing drug abuse is useless and actually creates MORE problems for society. I don't think legalizing drugs means that we as a society deem it healthy to use them. It just doesn't make any sense to keep them illegal. Same goes for prostitution. Criminalizing it doesn't stop it, doesn't change anything for the better. Like Cal said, let's try something new.

    ReplyDelete
  115. Damn you Rassles, now I'm rethinking my position. (no pun)

    ReplyDelete
  116. It's not that I don't think it should be legalized: I agree with that. But the people who hang out and leave comments on this site are probably not the people that are the problem.

    Well, you never know. That "Calamity" is shifty.

    We're all just kind of preaching to the choir.

    ReplyDelete
  117. It's just...nothing is that simple. I know you guys know that.

    ReplyDelete
  118. Shifty indeed.

    Seriously, we all come at this from different perspectives, just like anything. I have never known anyone in the sex industry, but I can admit to a fascination with them and a tendency to glamorize -- probably because I've never known anyone in the industry. I watch, read, surf all that I can find on the industry. I'm a consumer.

    And from that position, having never been abused, not knowing anyone personally who has chosen/been forced into a life of prostitution, the media around "the life" is, frankly, titillating. I follow the blogs of sex workers, I read their books, I watch their shows, I see their movies and their websites. These are the Nina Hartleys and Sharon Mitchells and College Coeds and Belle du Jours of the world, not the girls and women you see working the track on American Pimp.

    There is something extremely attractive to me about an educated slut. I recognize that I'm perpetuating the consumption of sex, that I'm objectifying and generalizing and glossing over the very real ills of prostitution.

    And I'm also being long-winded.

    ReplyDelete
  119. long-winded is my Indian name.

    ReplyDelete
  120. Is there a flatulence problem?

    ReplyDelete
  121. "There is something extremely attractive to me about an educated slut."

    Ditto.

    ReplyDelete
  122. Your review was perfect for this beating heart of a blog.

    ***

    Does anyone want http://twitter.com/therudetypist ?

    I don't want to talk to those people anymore so I'm handing it to someone who might want to do something with it, otherwise I'm going to delete it.

    ReplyDelete
  123. I'd take it, gap, but I'm pretty sure the animal lovers aren't ready for my bile.

    ReplyDelete
  124. The animal lovers are the best people there. They're open minded and appreciate dark humor...unless its about roasting pets. Actually, most of the animal lovers there would probably appreciate a decent 140 character long cat roasting.

    It's me. I can't handle communicating with 25,00o people.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Huh. That's a lot of people. How'd you end up with that gig?

    ReplyDelete
  126. I built it for Ask a few months ago because I was too cowardly to build it for myself, Ky.

    There, I said it.

    ReplyDelete
  127. I live in a computerized laboratory and spend my days building intangible things that produce revenue, all day long. I should blog about it, but it hurts to the point I can't write.

    ReplyDelete
  128. Are you a robot? Please say yes!

    ReplyDelete
  129. 24,000 minions awaiting your next twit.

    That kinda power would corrupt me.

    That or semi-regular sex.

    Or the Venture Bro's box set(hint)

    ReplyDelete
  130. The so-called power aspect of being able to update 25,000 people does nothing for me. Not comfy with it at all. But when I see a blog like this woman's above it does inspire something, a need to share it with people. I always believe people will appreciate something good. Often they don't get it.

    ReplyDelete
  131. How bad is it to say her blog gives my soul wood.

    And a brain chubby.

    Nothing on the Venture Bro's box set?

    Cheapos

    ReplyDelete
  132. THERE IS A VENTURE BROS. BOX SET? How is this possible? It's still going on right? I thought season four started in October. OH MY GOD DO NOT RUIN MY LIFE.

    ReplyDelete
  133. I love her blog. go melinda. :D

    ReplyDelete
  134. I have just installed iStripper, so I can have the hottest virtual strippers on my taskbar.

    ReplyDelete

Grow a pair.