Favorite Quotes of the Week:
I'm happy to take it on the chin, but there's no way I'm bending over in this crowd! Joel Klebanoff
Joel, what if we throw a nice, shiny quarter down on the ground? Like a blog ad? Rassles
The fact that humor blogs are inherently unfunny is ironically funny. warren
Funny's like fucking: those who think they're good at it aren't, and those who are don't tell you about it beforehand. Y'know - Surprise! I'm an hilarious fuck machine! Ryan Lawson
Dear Rassles,
I know things are sort of tough right now, but how about a raise? Oh, and maybe some bear claws in the break room every morning?
Thanks -Sarcasm
Hopefully Rassles and Sarcasm can reach an agreement before the trade deadline. ghost of keywork
She better pay Sarcasm whatever the hell he wants, because it's clear that Rassles could never function without him. Love Bites
Jesus, Krishna, and Gok, I thought we were going for "most obnoxious blog" not "everyone fucking hug each other and accept our differences." Rassles
Fuck Italy. Rassles
Fuck India. ghost of keywork
Fuck biscotti. Mister Crowley
From now on, I propose that Mister Crowley is the exception to every rule:
Indians are emo. Except for Crowley.
Gravity holds us firmly to earth. Except for Crowley.
All guys with popped collars are douchebags. Except for Crowley. Rassles
All Indians suck, except for Crowley. Love Bites
Uh, Love Bites just dropped a big steaming plop on a million different people at once. ghost of keywork
This thread is doing wonders for solidifying a big fat choice win. Blogger Who Beats the Most Dead Horses? Best Blog for Neverending Arguments Where Nothing Gets Accomplished Because Everyone Is Too Stubborn To Retreat? Colonel Custer Would Have Blogged Here. Rassles
The first post I read was like an ode to her TV. At 19 I would have written an ode to cock, or booze, or weed. Or my Doc Martens. But TV? TV was for porn viewing or Screaming Jeopardy or resting your beer on. Calamity
I think this blog is why pink princess diaries that you keep under your bed with a lock & key were invented. Love Bites
The unfortunate thing is that blogging has become a fad, and like low rise pants, not everyone should do this particular fad. Love Bites
Ooooh, it's even better than comment of the week. I like. And I always vote for me. Whatever, I like this better, there's more to look at. It's like you put my zipper on your blog.
ReplyDeleteGod, I love us.
ReplyDeleteGod, I love us, too, paragons of obnoxiously non-existent maturity that we are.
ReplyDeleteThis is like coming home to a steaming cup of coffee, a lit cigarette, and my neighbour with the endlessly barking dog castrated with a dull rock and begging for help on my front lawn: perfect.
ReplyDeleteI love you guys.
Seriously, could you maybe put down the coffee and call a vet or something?
ReplyDeleteRover, you're fine - it's your owner whom I little-head-guillotined with rocks.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I know; you're welcome. Good boy.
Wow. That just happened.
ReplyDeleteIf I don't win this, I'm leaving you all for irony.
ReplyDeleteOh, sarcasm, I know you better than that. You always come back to us no matter what that filthy tramp Irony does with her tongue.
ReplyDeleteThis is so hard. I mean, should I vote for me? Or me? Or me?
ReplyDeleteBest. Ever.