If You're Going To Fucking Swear, Do It Already

Hold on; I’ll even it out:

Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fucky fuckeroo.

There - no more "%$&#" or "F***", just a good, old fashioned fuck-sandwich to start the day off right. I’ll tell you, too, that fuck? Well, this guy at Xbox4NappyRash knows what I’m talking about...

Let it be said up front that I fucking love this guy. LOVE him. Can’t get enough. I read his blog back to front not because I’m supposed to review it, nor even because I wanted to - I had to finish it once I started: Mr. Nappy Rash and his +1 are trying to start a family, but, in his own words, he’s "currently stuck at faulty sperm junction", which sounds like a revolting place to visit, but still probably better for the tourists than "healthy sperm junction"...methinks the former is a lot less messy than the latter.

I want to say that I love me some dry, British humour (‘cause I do), but seeing as how the guy’s from Ireland, I have it stuck in my brain that calling an Irishman English is like calling an Australian an Asshole, so I’ll just say that the guy’s funny. Really funny, in fact:

"To be successful in this month we need to go to the chemist and buy a miracle. As that’s what it would most likely take. Unfortunately here in Holland the chemists are never open when you need them and besides, miracles are illegal here."

Not a hearty enough example? Well, luckily for you there’s the epic Sperm Runner series, wherein our intrepid author takes us through two harrowing attempts at getting his sample to the microbiology-department without succumbing to the embarrassment of stifled-laughs and sideways-glances.

Could it stand to be a little sleeker? Mm-hmm. Could I do without the cluttered-sidebar or the occasional goddamned meme? You bet your ass. Did any of that matter as I combed through the archives until I was too tired to write this review last night? Aside from leapfrogging a couple of those aforementioned memes, I was stunned to find that I had gone through the stash without even realizing it, voraciously eating-up every last morsel of Nappy-goodness.

Astonishingly candid, self-deprecatingly hilarious, enthralling; I want this guy to succeed, to conceive...he makes "I do love ya, you daft cow" sound so sweet that I’ve got fucking cavities over here.



Fight the good fight, sir, and luck be with you!

Next week: back to our regularly-scheduled venom...