Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Isn't Dancing A Sin?

Arulba, the author of Dance of the Mind, really drew the short straw this week when it came to reviewers. I like to think that I'm usually pretty fair-minded and objective as a critic. This week, however, I find myself in a stupid-ass blogument with some of my more religious readers over at my personal site. Therefore, the ice on which the God squad can skate is pretty thin in my neighborhood. When I saw the sea gulls that festoon DoMs header, they did not elicit the serenity that I'm sure they're designed to.

Now I need to be honest. I didn't read a lot of DoM. I went deep into the archives but the problem is that the vast majority of the posts are lessons from "A Course In Miracles". I didn't know anything about ACIM, as it's apparently known, and Arulba's description is far too verbose and jargon heavy. A quick Wikipedia search later and I found out that ACIM was a book "divinely penned" by two American psychologists in the 1970's. Great - disco era self-help meets Christianity. It's developed quite a following over the years much to the consternation of a lot of the more established Christian denominations.

I don't know what ACIM preaches, but if it's brought to you by the same people who want to make homosexuality, abortion, birth control and teaching evolution illegal then I'm not really interested. Even if it's brought to you be the more liberal theologians that had me singing "Kum-bay-fucking-ya" at summer camp in my formative years, I'm pretty happy with my spiritual life as is. Thank you very much.

But, even if I were more open minded to what DoM is selling, I would find it a difficult read. Arulba's posts are long-winded and are written with the assumption that the reader is already well versed in ACIM. It looks fine - clean, simple and well organized. But even the posts that aren't about ACIM aren't all that compelling. DoM is a blog for a very specific audience.

Which brings me to the real question for Arulba - why did you submit your site? If you're really after a review, then fine - far too wordy, a bit single-minded, but nice clean template. Verdict - "Meh".

But I get the creeping feeling that you're not really after our opinion. You've seen the goth avatars, you've read the foul-mouthed critiques, I wonder if your not here to proselytize. I know that the way a lot of these religious movements work is by conversion. Call me paranoid, but I can't fathom why someone who essentially writes a religious blog would submit here. If that's the case, if you're in the market for converts, then in the words of Jack Nicholson as Melvin Udall "sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here." That being said, your site will no doubt get an increase in traffic from this review. Maybe you've got what you wanted after all. You know what else you've got- a new rating, the Melvin*. Congrats!

* I hope I haven't exceeded my authority as fuckin' new guy. But I feel that we need a rating for blogs that, like a Jehovah's Witness, we'd just like to shut the front door on and hope that they go away. The Melvin.

UPDATE:
There is every indication to suggest that Arulba did not submit her site to be reviewed. That being the case, then I'm sorry for comparing her to a Jehovah's Witness.

Now, to the malicious ass monkey who did submit her site: knock it the fuck off. It's not funny, it's juvenile - like volunteering someone to be bathroom monitor in junior high school. If it happens again, I'm coming over to your house and pissing on your PC.

That is all.

73 comments:

  1. I do, however, like that Rufus Wainwright video. Should have mentioned that - Arulba's got good taste in music.

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  2. I didn't submit my site. I write for myself and whoever wants to come along and have yet to advertise my blog. Someone must have done that for me.

    But I do have to say.. I think I do have excellent taste in music. (I adore Rufus!!) Thank you.

    It is my understanding that ACIM is an atheism. I haven't yet come to any decisive conclusions about it and even if I did I certainly wouldn't "sell it". But so far it seems to fit in the perennial wisdom which doesn't rely upon a God (although it uses the terminology for a society that is so heavily dependent upon it.)

    Like anything, you have your fundamentalist ACIMers. There are always those who need certainty in anything they engage upon. As far as I know, there are no ACIMers who want to make homexuality, abortion, birth control and the teaching of evolution illegal. But I don't really know that much about it.

    If you read any further in my blog you'd see that I've actively campaigned against such things (especially homosexuality, that's one of my big issues - I've been out there with banners and rainbows).

    I would most definitely agree, my blog is for a very specific audience. I don't write for anyone but myself and anyone who happens to want to come along. I have yet to advertise my blog although there seem to be those who are more than willing to do it for me.

    I'm sure your spiritual life is great. I see no reason to question it. I'm certainly not selling ACIM. I'm not even sure I buy into it.

    But hey! Never thought I'd see my blog compared to something a Jehovah's Witness would write! I told my husband and he couldn't stop laughing.

    I'm pro evolution, pro homosexuality (belong to a church that does marriage quaker style so that gays can be married religiously even if the state won't recognize it), pro dancing, pro self-expression, pro-individuality. anti-moral dogmatism.

    I'll go away if you want. But I never actually knocked. Somebody did that for me and you failed to notice.

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  3. Just curious - do you have the IP address of the person who submitted my blog?

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  4. Here's the thing. We occasionally get a reviewee who claims that they didn't submit the site. I'm not in a position to decide whether or not that's the case. That's between the reviewee and his or her god. Appropriate.

    Anyway, the funny thing is that this claim always follows a bad review. No one ever gets a great review and says "I didn't submit".

    Just an observation.

    When Ms. Bites logs on, perhaps she can tell us what the submission said.

    If there is some fuckwit out there submitting other people's blogs, knock it the fuck off. Defeats the purpose of the site.

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  5. I had to run over and make sure I didn't sound like a God squad member before I read today's blog for review! I don't think I'm a member, Booty! (ack!)

    Whether she submitted or not, Arulba will get tons of new traffic and very possibly someone will connect with what she's saying.

    I didn't read a lot, but that is only because it just isn't the type of blog I enjoy.

    The Prof. is right. Clean crisp template which is good... no eye bleeding or anything. She writes intelligently. Even I can follow what she's saying!

    I'm just more attracted to blogs that are personal. I'm a complete emotion voyeur. I want to read and feel, feel, feel!

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  6. Maybe more of a God Scout, Angel.

    And yeah, I guess I'm a bit of an emotional voyeur as well - another reason this site didn't turn my crank.

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  7. I love the Melvin. The only religious site I have ever fucking loved was
    http://asksistermarymartha.blogspot.com/

    I still can't figure out if she's really a nun or not.

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  8. Maybe I'm a religion whore? After all, somedays I'll hit my knees if a guy walks by me smelling good.

    I'm gonna go read the maybe nun blog Mutha mentioned. I like guessing games.

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  9. I hope I haven't exceeded my authority as fuckin' new guy. But I feel that we need a rating for blogs that, like a Jehovah's Witness, we'd just like to shut the front door on and hope that they go away. The Melvin.

    Find it, e-mail it to me, and it's in the queue of possible ratings. ;)

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  10. Ah, I LOVE the smell of religion in the morni...wait, what time is it?

    Fuck, where have I been?

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  11. Between the creamy thighs of the woman who loves you, one would hope.

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  12. Hey, speaking of which: why didn't anybody tell me that Advil makes you frisky?

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  13. It seems like ARulba's being harassed online, which is unfortunate. I will look up the IP address and repost it.

    So, I'm not even going to comment on this site. I actually believe her.

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  14. I've definitely got to start taking more Advil.

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  15. Yeah, anyone who lists the Ashtavakra Gita/Samhita as a favorite book is probably not some crazy FLDS who needs a dance lesson from Kevin Bacon.

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  16. Did someone say creamy thighs?

    Arulba acquits herself well I think.

    I've got a soul on offer if her God is recruiting.

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  17. Arulba lives in Austin, Texas where everyone is apparently a religous whack job. I can't figure out if she is a Baptist or not. There is a lot of contradiction in the blog.

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  18. Well, being a religious wackjob from Austin, I can say that anonymous needs a fresh Jesus enema. Maybe two. I have to assume that anonymous is the person that submitted Arulba's blog.

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  19. What kind of fuckhole submits someone else's blog and then comments on it? ANONYMOUSLY, no less.

    Shitface.

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  20. This blog is very crude, and apparently with violent hostility. You people can't even spell properly. Please find another hobby.

    There is nothing wrong with being religious.

    God bless you!!!

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  21. Aruba is in a different league than you people!!!

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  22. Tell me that was intentional, please...

    you big fucking wally.

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  23. You people? I'm pretty sure Jesus would have reconsidered his crucifixion if God had let him know that assholes like you were going to be roaming the planet. "Fuck that. My hands hurt. Peace out."

    Worship that.

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  24. Jesus told me that you people suck.

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  25. Hardcore Jesus? Is that you?

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  26. Jesus loves you.

    Everyone else thinks you're a prick.

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  27. Hardcore Jesus thrashes on air guitar. And he takes wicked bong rips with my pizza delivery girl.

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  28. I always wanted to go to Aruba. Or was it Aragula? Hmm. Vacation paradise v. salad greens.

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  29. I wonder if anonymous is George!? They have the same level of language skills and it's about the right time in Indonesia.

    George, is that you? We've missed you...

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  30. I never did like Pat Robertson.

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  31. ACIM was created by Pat Robertson>

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  32. wait, wasn't that the village people?

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  33. xbox4nappyrash is a total queer!!! Look at that faggot picture!!! Enjoy your anal sex

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  34. Raised as an alter boy, I learned from the best.

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  35. Jesus was queer too, google it.

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  36. the sandals were a dead giveaway

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  37. Well, maybe bi. Idk, seems like he was always looking for children and sheep.

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  38. Yep, Anon is definitely George. Or a 14 year old.

    No, YOU'RE a queer!

    Your Mom's a queer!

    Nanny, nanny, na na!

    Go back to the playground little boy.

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  39. Awwww! People just like me, being called losers by some religious whack job...it's like 4th grade all over again.

    Wait a minute.

    It's not cool to be anonymous, Mrs. K. Not cool.

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  40. The Dutch are gayer than Frankie goes to Hollywood!!!

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  41. 4th graders beleive in global warming. Grow up!!!

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  42. Relax, anonymous. That's what Frankie say. Keywork says, "Go fuck yourself. Amen."

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  43. Have I said how much I fucking LOVE this website?

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  44. It's too bad fourth graders don't believe in spelling 'believe' properly. "I" before "E", except after "C". Dumbass.

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  45. I bet xbox4nappyrash has fybromyalgia.

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  46. Anonymous is professor booty

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  47. Is it contageous? bend over...

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  48. I think you mean Anonymous WANTS Professor Booty, don't you sweet cheeks?

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  49. I think anonymous is grooming me

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  50. I bet anonymous has hairy palms.

    p.s. Hardcore Jesus says rock on wit yo bad selfs. Seriously. About the selfs part, I mean. It was a direct quote.

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  51. Booty, don't scare the troll. I've been praying for him for weeks. Hardcore Jesus answers prayer!

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  52. Man, what a big, steaming bowl of boooooolshit - you guys left me, like, NO leftovers.

    Granted, I'm two hours late to the party, but still...

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  53. I think anonymous is grooming me

    Did anyone else visualize two monkeys in the jungle eating lice off one another, or am I just twisted?

    p.s. Has been slow around here without Calamity, I understand she has been puking her guts out all week.

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  54. morning sickness?

    I shall not be amused...

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  55. Pregnancy is hot. The aftermath usually isn't though.

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  56. Xbox, you blasphemer! DO NOT utter words associated with pregnancy in my direction or else. If I get up the duff, I'm totally blaming you. My fiance will not be pleased.

    Missed you guys! I was pulling a Linda Blair a la The Exorcist. The power of Hardcore Jesus compelled me, though, and I'm all good now.

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  57. Pregnancy is hot.

    You are fucked up in ways I can't even begin to described.

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  58. I'm gonna have to take that as a compliment I guess.

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  59. Well, seriously.

    Pregnant dumpster fucking?

    That's just all kinds of fucked up.

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  60. Look it's a whole helluva lot better than most of the dumpster activity typically associated with pregnant women. Watch out, I'm en fuego today.

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  61. You all are hilarious!! I'm grinning ear to ear. Thank you!! :)

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  62. Aruba, sweetie, come join the mayhem any time. We like Caribbean islanders.

    What I wouldn't give to jerk Key's chicken right now...

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  63. WHAT. THE. HELL. DID. I. MISS.

    JESUS. GOD.

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  64. Oh Maggie, you missed the fun, dammit.

    This was fun, but Driz's review is pure gold. Well, the aftermath is.

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  65. No, Xbox, you were right the first time: it's the REVIEW that's gold.

    Ha ha? Anybody?

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  66. Maggie, where in fuck have you been?

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  67. bahahahahahahahahahah.

    No, you have to take after him with a shovel until HE runs. That's the only way to deal with a driz.

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  68. I feel sorry for Arulba.

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  69. What is Black and Yellow and flies???

    A school bus full of niggers flying off a cliff!

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Grow a pair.