Poop!

It turns out that I am reviewing a blog today; this blog is called Mental Poo.

Mm-hmm.

Mental Poo (tagline: "Jerking off your funny bone, one post at a time") is ugly. Not "ugly" like striped shirt/plaid pants-ugly, but profoundly ugly. If you sat this blog next to a rose, it would envelop said flower and send a sweeping pulse of hideousness throughout the world, leaving rotted plants and disillusioned, crying children in its wake. As it stands, I’m surprised that rioting mobs of cyber-townspeople haven’t yet chased this blog back to the bog that spawned it and butchered it violently with pitchforks and torches.

Don’t get me wrong - I understand the appeal of hacky, cut & paste ugliness in a header as a warning of the hacky, crudely (and assumedly quickly) rendered post-supporting pictures stuffed into each entry, but goddamn it, Moooooog35, you have control over this situation: Yes, it’s the words that count, but you can’t be telling me that Stephen Hawking wouldn’t transform himself into a muscle-bound heartbreaker if all he had to do was fiddle with the "fonts & colors" option on Blogger?

As for those aforementioned words, well, enh. I mean, from what I could tell while slicing between the thickets of overgrown advertisements & tautological clutter, he can be amusing, at times, but can also come across as that comic who blew the manager of the comedy-club to get a spot opening for a good comedian, and I imagine that, in front of an audience, a lot of these posts would be met with silence, possibly an awkward cough, maybe an occasional back-row-hurled tomato between the eyes.

Also, Moooooog35:

You have, on display, a picture of a monkey fellating itself - just the innocent eyes of a monkey looking back at you with his cock in his mouth. Surely, sir, there is something in you that dies just a little bit every time you type "f*ck" or "sh*t", isn‘t there? You’re already swearing; stop being a chickenshit about it.

Here’s some across-the-board advice: stop with the clutter, stop with the ads, stop with the "anyways...", stop with the pictures of American Gladiators; it’s doesn’t take much to elicit a genuine laugh out of ol’ Nutjobber, and I’m groaning every time I open a new post and collide with more one-note jokes. "Kids are stupid" is, in fact, funny...once. The premise of short phrase/vague political-incorrectness, however, wears itself fucking thin in a goddamned hurry.



I’m double bored.