Friday, June 12, 2009

Less Crap, More Writing


Today's reviewee has been "blogging" since 2007. However, Kris Nair has not posted anything in exactly one month.

Which is mostly a relief.

I like to start things off pretty and with kind words, so let's do that first. Your title, less humans, more robots, fan-fucking-tastic my friend. I would just like to see a capital letter or four in there. Your template is clean and well organized, I love it and your archives? Eye candy, archive porn right there. I wanted to lick the screen, you know, had it loaded quickly for me. It didn't, but I'll forgive you.

Now for the bad. Kris is another in our long line of Indian blogging friends. He's not emo, cutting himself or crying out for universal understanding. Thank the heavens for that. However? He is a 'Mentor Capitalist' out of New Delhi. I'll let you click over to his blog to find out just what a mentor capitalist is, while I cough "bullshit" into my hand. I'll try not to let the fact that I was abused for years by a man from India, that was in a business very much like this, stand in the way of objectivity.

Ahem.

No, you know what? Fuck that. Let's stop right here. If your blog mostly consists of:

YouTube videos

Quotes from other people


Clever pictures and cartoons

Cut and pasted articles

Then stop asking us to review your shit. You are wasting our fucking time!







and








Suck it, Kris Nair, Suck it.

33 comments:

  1. It's like that annoying woman in my office that insists on emailing forwards to everyone because "you can't print a youtube" got herself a blog or something.

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  2. VVD, I fucking love you. I'm happy to see that you took Siuil's well-intentioned advice and linked directly to the suck. *snicker* With that said, let's make out.

    Girl pile!

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  3. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 11:03 AM

    I'm not too proud to admit that Siuil haunted my fucking dreams last night.

    It was my mistake that linking to an entire blog that sucks was enough.

    So I wasted my time linking over and over to things that suck.

    A whole lot of suck.

    I call topsies!

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  4. This isn't a blog, it's a regurgitation of someone else's shit, which sounds as bad as it is.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 11:05 AM

    Regurgitated shit is still shit.

    Just redigested.

    Oooh, look! I made up a new word.

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  6. It's like that episode of House where the dude was basically pooping out of his mouth. This is the blogging equivalent of that.

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  7. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 11:08 AM

    At least I can stop looking for the blogger equivalent of shit spout.

    That makes today...

    Successful!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Aaaaaahhhhh, well directed hatred. Beautiful. So yeah, Kris Nair, suck our collective genitalia.

    Well executed, VVD.

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  9. I feel better and better about my review every day

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  10. calm down womens!

    that archive look suggests it's a 'tumblr' blog hosted on tumblr.com

    all tumblr.com's blog archive have the same look

    http://garfieldminusgarfield.net/archive
    http://147xxxx.tumblr.com/archive
    http://blog.iphography.com/archive

    add it in the FAQ or something-- NO MEDIA-WHORIC TUMBLRs

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  11. The bad thing about reviewing these blogs is there is no fucking writing,the good thing is there is very little reading. The suckage here is palpable.

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  12. I'm in desperate need of some 'suckage'.

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  13. Any clue where this guy lives in Delhi? Maybe Parakeet and I can gift him a distionary or something. A writing guide, perhaps. I see this place has been rocking while I was away.

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  14. I sucked a lot last night. It was wonderful

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  15. Vivan VonDoom6/12/2009 2:47 PM

    Anonymous, I'm well aware of what Tumblr is and that this blog is obviously a Tumblr as he has a "my favorite Tumblrs" bar on the side.

    But thanks for clearing it up. This is obviously NOT what we review.

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  16. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 2:48 PM

    PS - It doesn't matter of all their archives look the same. It's yummy. The end.

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  17. If Anonymous hadn't pointed that out I would have never known. I'm so embarrassed.

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  18. Speaking of suckage, I just saw a Dr. Pepper ad with Dr. Dre. OGs and Gs aren't what they used to be.

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  19. Don't feel bad, Cal. When I read 'tumblr' all I could think of was a short glass from which one swills hard booze.

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  20. Damn, it feels good to be a gangsta.

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  21. And even better to be in a booze swillin' girl pile.

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  22. I was actually being facetious, Mongo. I should bone up on my sarcasm skills.

    I said bone.

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  23. I dunno Cal, maybe I'm just a dense one today.

    Bone?
    Pumpkin muffin?

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  24. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 4:12 PM

    Ha. Bone.

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  25. V VonDoom - have I ever told you I always thought the straw in that drink at the forefront of your avatar was you giving someone the finger?

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  26. V VonDoom - have I ever told you I always thought the straw in that drink at the forefront of your avatar was you giving someone the finger?

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  27. I know, it does look like the finger. It's nearly perfect.

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  28. See? Now I feel all hipstery with BB agreeing about the finger and everything.

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  29. Vivian VonDoom6/12/2009 7:46 PM

    Mongo,you are my hipster momma. Email me... vivivondoom@gmail.com...

    I have something to ask you.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Confusing. The whole damn blog thing with the picture squares and ... it was like fucking pictograms or some shit.

    ReplyDelete

Grow a pair.