AniMeh

I have to start this review with an admittance: I don't know shit about Anime. I know as much about Anime and Asian film as I do about Indian culture, which is basically nothing, as a few commenters were so kind to point out to me a couple of weeks ago. To those "commenters" (some of whom I suspect may have been or known the reviewed blogger) I want to make it clear that my critique of a blog written by a person who belongs to a culture outside of my own is not a reflection of my feelings or opinions about all the people who belong to that particular culture. In other words, if I hate your blog it's because your blog sucks. My hatred of your blog has nothing to do with your ethnicity, country of origin, hair color, religious beliefs or sexual orientation. I'm not swayed by what you look like, what you weigh, where you're from, or what you do for a living. When I review, what I give is only my personal opinion, which you asked me to reveal, and I base that on the merit of your skills as a writer and story-teller. And for the love of of all that's holy and unholy, if I compliment your grammar or language skills don't get your panties in a bunch and start accusing me of being racist and condescending. If you ask me to review your blog, then an honest comment on your skills as a writer is appropriate. You can shake your fist to the sky and whine and call racism and your blog will still suck and I will still hate it. Only after all that, I will also hate you. Got it?

Back to my review of JapanCinema, an Asian Film/Anima Review database. My only peripheral experience with this film genre was in college when I knew this guy who spent most of his spare time watching it and obsessing over it. He eventually got so depressed that he was hospitalized in a locked psychiatric ward and needed electric shock treatments. It was a fucking horrible situation. Did watching big eyed cartoon characters deal with cataclysmic world events drive this guy to madness? Probably not. I'm fairly certain there's no causality between him watching Anime and developing severe clinical depression, but since that time the two have become inextricably linked in my mind. So when I saw my review assignment was an anime film review blog, I had to resist the urge to swallow a handful of pills from an old prescription for Zoloft sitting idly in the back of my medicine cabinet.

The bottom line is that if you watch Anime/Asian films, then this blog may be of interest to you. Otherwise, there is really no point to reading it at all. The blogger, whose name is Marcello, acknowledges in many of his reviews that he is writing for an audience already familiar with the genre, such as in this recent post where he says, "I won’t waste time giving you a synopsis. Those of you interested in reading this review should be familiar regardless". He is self-aware enough to realize that his blog is a niche blog and writes his reviews accordingly. He makes no real attempt to appeal to a wider audience.

I do admire this Marcello's obvious enthusiasm for Anime. He has a deep respect for the artistry involved in the creation of the films. In fact, his passion for the beauty of some of the reviewed films is almost enough to make me want to risk a mental breakdown and pop one in my DVR. He even provides some helpful preview videos of the movies he's critiquing. I have to agree that the animation is quite lovely on some of these films. Those big-eyed children are a little creepy but also beatifully drawn and interesting. This blogger also reviews live action Asian films and some American films that were inspired by, or direct remakes of, Asian films (i.e. The Departed, which is based on the Chinese film "Infernal Affairs").

Truthfully, though, most of Marcello's reviews read like a junior high school book report.

The one thing that really annoyed me about the movie was the ending I can’t say why to much because that it’ll give it away but it is heart breaking with what happens to one of the characters in the movie.

Amusingly, he has the tendency to make up words, such as "dramatical" and he makes some odd word choices, such as here where he uses the word "nature" rather than the more logical "name" - "Eureka Seven...is of course another film based off of the popular tv series of the same nature." There are also some careless spelling and grammatical errors ( i.e. "In terms of story
this didnt left me with an empty feeling"). It's actually hard for me to believe that this guy even managed to publish a children's book, but according to his About Me he did. Perhaps Marcello is capable of better writing but gets lazy and fails to edit any of his posts before publishing them. I sometimes make grammatical errors when I write, but I don't make a habit of it. If this blogger has any respect for his readers and himself, he should spend a little more time and effort editing his work before posting it.

He also might want to read over some of his reviews to make sure that they actually make sense. Take this contradictory excerpt for instance:

I was very skeptical as to whether or not I’d like this movie, since I didn’t particularly enjoy the time I spent with the TV series. The movie was breathtaking. The animation quality, the art style, character design, everything in the artistic realm of this movie has been improved from its television form. Again, I’m not sure how much it would appeal to fans of the TV series. However, if you’ve never seen Escaflowne, I’d say this is a good place to start. It feeds you the plot with relative consistancy, and it’ll probably get you itching to see the TV series, too. But if you’re like me and you love the show and everything about it, then you may walk away complaining.

So does he like the original television series or not? I'm not going to pretend like I care about the answer to that. But maybe his readers do. I'm pretty certain that they want him to have a consistent opinion.

As for the template, it's very functional and easy to navigate. If you're anything like me and seeing use of the phrase "love da laydeeeez" makes you die a little inside then I would suggest avoiding the About Me section of this blog altogether. The sidebar is very busy. Is it really necessary to have sections called Categories, Archives, Popular Reviews, Newest Reviews, and Anime Series Reviews? That's overkill. On top of all those, he has a damn Twitter feed. I have an irrational hatred for Twitter feeds on blogs. If you must include your Twitter in some way on your blog, then I just feel that a "Follow me on Twitter" link should suffice.

There's a part of me that wanted to give this blogger a flaming finger or two. But I can't bring myself to do it. So it's a

Lord, I Was Born a Ramblin' Woman

I'm new here, so I don't really have the right to complain about having to read yet another boring, Indian blog. But I'm going to gripe about it anyway. I wanted to like it, I really did. But Lost on the Street is gobsmackingly tedious. I guess the point of the blog is to entice her readers to visit the numerous beautiful locales of India. I wish she would just quit with the writing and take up photography because I think her photos are fabulous. Those pictures are what made me want to get off my ass and visit those places. But her words made me want to curl up on the couch for a nap.

She does take the time to write about non-travel related topics and upon reading some of those posts my ennui turned to anger. She actually contends in this one that housewives are using feminism as an excuse to be lazy. What a loathsome thing to contend. Her opinion that housewives, specificially educated housewives, have no right to claim to be feminists is downright disgusting. If she's going to make offensive statements on her blog she should at least back it up with a good argument. Another post that pissed me off is this one about tipping. What is the big fucking deal about leaving a 20% tip? She mentions in another one of her blogs that she has a maid. If she can afford to pay a maid she can afford a god damn tip.

Still, I'm not entirely unsympathetic to this blogger. She has a bitterness about her that I can relate to. And I can certainly identify with her complacency. She can form a coherent sentence and at least attempts to be grammatically correct. I'm assuming (perhaps wrongly) that English is a second language for her. If I'm right, then that's pretty impressive. I know a few native speakers of this fine language that can't do that. But being a good blogger entails a lot more than good grammar and sentence structure.

I suggest that she hone her story telling skills. As Love Bites recently told another reviewee, the topic of the story isn't as important as how you tell it. Lost desperately needs to edit. She seems to think that every last detail and thought is worth including each post. And the rambling has reached a critical level. She has trouble focusing and subsequently veers off in some confusing directions. What's annoying is that I'm not telling her something that she doesn't already know. It's apparent that she recognizes it as a problem because she mentions it in her posts. She wrote at the end of one post:

And thus ends one more pointless post. Promise this will be the last..pointless post that is.

But she broke that promise, over and over again.

Her template is dull but I don't really mind that. I'd much rather a dull template than a hideous one. She has tabs on the top but she doesn't really utilize them well. Lower down on the page is where all the trouble starts. In addition to her archives, she has way too much shit going on - tags, categories, favorites, just written, recent comments, and one of those creepy and annoying "Live Traffic Feeds". My suggestion is to eliminate all that crap and just use the tabs.

I do have one good thing to say about this blogger and her blog - Her niece is precious and those pictures of her pierced through the hardened layers of my bitter heart. That's not easy to do. Usually the only kids I find adorable are the ones I made myself.

In any case, this blogger gets a

She has potentional if she can learn to put a filter between her mind and the keyboard.

Drugmonkey on My Back

You know when you finally get around to visiting your grandmother and you have to sit for what feels like a millenia on a plastic covered couch sucking on the 10 year old piece of candy she squeezed into your hand when you came in the door, in a room that's about as hot as the inside of a volcano and all she does is drone on and on and on and on about her arthritic knee and her high blood pressure and her faulty pacemaker? Very valid complaints, those. And you know that you're supposed to deeply care about all of it, that it matters, and that she has every right to bitch and moan because getting old and decrepit is just total suck. But fuck it all, you can't wait for it to be over because it's just so incessant and upsetting and why the fuck is it so god damn hot in here? Well today's blogger is your grandma, except instead of complaining about goiters and osteoporosis he rails against those that are supposed to help treat those things, namely "Big Pharma" and those who are fundamentally (and, in his opinion, stupidly) opposed to a government run health care system. There's a lot of negativity to take in, but just like that visit to your grandma, in the end it's kind of worth it.

Drugmonkey is a pharmacist and he has acquired a lot of knowledge about the important topics he bitches about in his 20 year career. He comes off as somewhat condescending and is highly dismissive of those who hold opposing opinions. I'm not saying that he's wrong. In fact, I agree with his stance on a lot of these issues. I'm one of the few relatively young people I know that has needed to use my health insurance quite a bit. And it saddens me to think that there are millions of people who don't have the same option to get their healthcare needs met easily and affordably. But that doesn't mean I want to spend my time reading post after post espousing government run healthcare and exposing the deceptive tactics of pharmaceutical companies.

Luckily, Drugmonkey can write well and his angry tirades are infused with a healthy dose of humor (Oh sweet Jesus, that was an unintentional pun. I fucking hate puns but I hate rewriting sentences even more sometimes. I'm so lazy). His "Pill Counting" posts are particularly funny. For some reason those "day in the life" of your sometimes friendly, neighborhood pharmacist stories were more compelling and interesting to me than the more heavy "sick teenage girl denied a liver transplant" fare. Honestly, I thought this was hilarious. There really are so many morons roving about. Drugmonkey and I have this in common: we are both simultaneously disgusted and fascinated by stupid people.

I'm not usually one to care so much about the way a blog looks as long as the content is interesting and the writing is kick ass. But this blog template is so unbelievably boring that it bears mentioning. The white text on black background makes me feel like I'm being schooled. The only thing that's missing is a green alphabet header image. In fact, it currently has no header image, so anything would be an improvement.

This blog's subject matter is very important. It makes me ashamed of my own blog's content, which is so petty in comparison. Drugmonkey's anger about the health care crisis is fueled by his compassion and his desire to help people. He cares enough about health care reform to devote a lot of effort to educating people about it and also to incite others to action. So for his quality writing and admirable cause I dispense

I Kissed a Girl and I Liked It

When I saw the title of today's blog, Lessons from the Kissing Booth, I was filled with anticipation. I mean kissing usually leads to sex, and who doesn't want to read about sex? Alas, the title was a big tease as there was little kissing to be found and I was left scratching my head wondering how the blog title was at all relevant to the content of the blog. Considering Samantha was an English major maybe it's a reference to some great work of literature or something completely symbolic that's gone right over my simple little head.

There were 6 years worth of posts to peruse so I could only read a sampling of them. At first I found the blog to be a bit tedious, but after a while I began to appreciate that Samantha is a skilled writer. I found myself melting into her blog, hypnotized by her pretty, pretty words and lulled by the musical quality of her work. Though quite beautiful, her writing has an aloof quality that has the tendency to distance the reader. I get the sense that, at times, she is more interested in flexing her verbal muscles than in sharing a part of herself with us. There are moments when I feel she is being purposely vague about something important, while still managing to artfully capture minor details of an experience. I find it frustrating. Sometimes people are too poetic for their own good. I did find a few posts that elaborated on some rather personal and painful history, so there may be a reason why she tends to skirt around some significant details of her experiences. Not everything can be faced head on.

Samantha is a well-rounded, well-read, well-educated and well-traveled single woman. From what I can tell she has dealt with a lot of tragedy in her 26 years. Despite all that she has endured, she still seems to be enamored with life and all it’s small miracles, beauties and possibilities. It’s an outlook I admire. I wish I could see the world through her lens, in such sharp and illuminated detail. I kind of love her, actually. How could you not?

So. Hello there. I'm samantha. I like dirty jokes and cursing like a sailor, red shoes and argyle, potato chips, puppies, beer, and the word "pulchritudinous." I like to spend weekday evenings in bars or at home with my tambourie and the Northwest's finest indie pop. I do not like people who cheat, telephones, doing the dishes, lettuce, or the look I get when the bartender doesn't think I'm old enough to be in there. My doctor has confirmed that I am finally 5'1" tall. I weigh less than three numbers but no you cannot lift me up to see.

I like daisies, most of all. Daisies and hugs that last just a little too long.

I suggest that Samantha use the preceding paragraph as her "About Me" because it is far superior to what is currently there. In fact, when I read the About Me, saw the butterfly header image and the dismal grey background, I wasn't too excited about reading the blog. Which is a shame because it really should be read. The one complaint I do have is that her archived posts are not titled. She does, however, apply titles to her posts in the “Sometimes Worth Remembering” and “Traveling” sections. The lack of titles in her archives made it impossible for me to link to some of them here.

I don’t think “Lessons from the Kissing Booth” is a blog for everyone. If you want funny, down to earth posts then this blog is not for you. But if you want artfully crafted introspection, give Samantha a read. I have bestowed upon her:

Catcher in the Why, God, Why?

Indian bloggers tend to fare poorly on review around these parts. So when I received my assignment and saw that it was, in fact, a young Indian blogger I'd be reviewing, I was understandably apprehensive. But I'm an open-minded gal so I delved right in, determined to form an unbiased opinion. One thing became perfectly clear to me right from the start: The author of Slow Tumbling Life is afflicted with that naval-gazing disease which renders him overly fascinated with every little thought in his head. I empathize; I too have suffered from this same affliction. But he has an exaggerated case of this particular illness. This guy is so fascinated by his own mind that he expressed a desire to buy some techno device that would enable him to have a conversation with himself.

It's difficult for me to describe what exactly this blog is about. There are posts about time travel, boring, overly detailed descriptions of mundane events, and fictional conversations with his dog, Cookie (which are, in essence, conversations with himself). This blogger can write very well, actually, but the problem is that you have to dig through a lot of boring shit to find the good stuff. His blog about being sent to boarding school at the age of 6 was one such treasure. But then he gives us this, which is quite frankly the most boring combination of words I have ever had the misfortune to lay my eyes upon.

He likens himself to Holden Caulfield, which is really annoying to me. Instead of an actual profile we get a quote from Catcher in the Rye. Great. I liked the book as much as anyone, but I feel as if Holden is such a typical hero for angsty teenagers and young adults. They need to get a new fucking hero already. The blogger is of the opinion that "you are branded super intelligent almost as soon as you feel, or rather you convince others that you feel, alienated and that angst runs through your arteries." And this couldn't be further from the truth as far as I'm concerned.

He has an aggravating way of jumping around to different topics on the same post. Sometimes the beginning part of a post will be excellent and funny and then the end will suck. Such as on this post which starts off about his confusion at bathrooms that are gender identified by elephants' asses and ends up about some boring movie or something. I don't know.

Some of the descriptions of events in this blog are downright baffling to me. Take this for instance (as he describes how he is crazy like Holden Caulfield):

I really do some of the same crazy things, though. Honest to God. Like I remember a few months ago our family (my parents, my brother and sister in law, and me) got into this terrific war. It must have lasted for about 6 hours. Me against all of them. All of us fell sick after the fight I remember, it was so ferocious! But I remember at one point I left everybody to go to the loo; and inside I stood in front of the giant mirror and smiled and made crazy faces for quite a while. I wasn't upset at all. Then I went back and rejoined the ruckus. I was laughing silently and all in the loo. This and other such insanities are an integral part of my daily existence...

What the fuck is that about? Am I the only person who finds this family interaction slightly creepy?

The template is pretty standard and non-offensive. The site is easily navigated. I actually like the header image and it seems appropriate considering that this blog is basically a virtual explosion of its author's brain. The blogger readily acknowledges that fact. Personally, I prefer more heart in my blogs. The bloodier, the better. And this blog is desperately lacking in heart. I wish this blogger would take his own advice:

I think one should write if they have something interesting to say; not try and say anything in an interesting manner.

And stop thinking things like this: "things might change around me but slowtumblinglife’s life will forever be inherently tragic." You went to a fancy boarding school, have a good job, come from a nice family, employ a cook, a maid and someone to iron your damn clothes for you. I'm having a hard time seeing the tragedy.

Maybe this blog is great and I'm just not intellectual enough to grasp its utter brilliance. Maybe I can't enjoy it completely because of the cultural differences that exist between this blogger and me. As I said above, this blogger can write well and I found some parts that I really enjoyed reading. They were just too few and far between.

So, it's a .