Thursday, January 18, 2007

My Own Private Idaho

I have a confession to make. Inside this bitter, jaded, cynical blogger-ass-smacking exterior, there apparently resides big huge squishy sweet lesbian. And she has a new blog-crush. My blog-crush's name is Kristi, she lives in Idaho, she's a mommy-blogger (boo! hiss!), and she's a home-schooler (eek!).

In a million years if you'd told me I'd develop a secret lesbian crush on a homeschooling mommyblogger who lives in Idaho, I'da told you that you'd been drinking drano in your gatorade bottle and done gone plain outta your head.

But it's true.

I lurve this blog. It's so delicious and tasty that I could totally sink my teeth into it and drain it of every single drop of sweet snarky goodness. Note the fangs. I could. Seriously.

Peoples...this is the best damn blog I've seen in like...sixty million years. OMG, I almost got teary-eyed just thinking about how good it is after all the crap I've had to peruse in the last two months.

The layout is plain, clean, and perfect (although Kristi's computer-monkey-slave needs to get his ayuss in gear and fix the header image, it's broken in IE). [Note: 5 minutes after I posted this, the problem was fixed, and the header image RAWKS.]

The writing is fan-fucking-tastic.

I'm seriously considering driving to Idaho and offing the computer-monkey-slave so I can sieze his delectable wife (taking my boyfriend, a far better computer-monkey-love-slave, along of course), and then living in happy polygamistic goodness with our mingled families for the rest of our days. We'll fit in just fine in Idaho. Nobody will even bat a home-schooling eyelash at us.

I would like to know how a Texan with this wicked a sense of humor ended up homeschooling in Idaho, but that's something she can tell me across the pillow some morning when the sun is just creeping over the mountains and the ice is congealing on the sunlit window of our cozy 10-bedroom *Big Love*-nest.

Truthfully, I love her that much.

You will, too. But I don't plan to share my future sister-wife.

I give it
and a .

5 comments:

  1. Oh. My. Blog. I LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELVOELVOEVLOVE

    YOU TOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    For realz.

    ReplyDelete
  2. PS...I'm a strictly likes-boys kind of girl, but thanks for the offer. My first lesbian blog stalker! I've made it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. truthfully, I'm a 100% penis girl myself, but I do love your blog. Like, seriously. LOVE IT.

    Well done!

    ReplyDelete
  4. If either of you decide to hop over the fence, let me know.

    ReplyDelete

Grow a pair.