Monday, March 05, 2007

I Feel So Unsatisfied. Wonder Why...

It seems like forever since I've posted here, and I won't fucking lie-I enjoy having one less thing to worry about in my busy-as-fuck-all life. Before I continue, however, I'd like to take a moment to ask a very important question:

What the fuck is with guys not giving a shit if a chick orgasms? Huh?

Obviously she was kind enough to hop on your dong, so maybe you should put a tad bit more effort into things than "finger, finger..zzzzzzz."

Okay, I just really had to get that off my chest. *cough*

So today I get the pleasure of reviewing Red Hog Diary . I tend to fall hopelessly in love with a blogs that involve a complete train wreck of a human being blogging away the intricate details of their daily debauchery , or doesn't have oodles of introspection oozing from it's every post that sheds light. Basically, I'm a glutton for blogs that portray a human being in all of their wonderful and often times fucked up and twisted glory, but you all know that. So imagine my delight when the blog loads and my conservative, Jewish ass see's a giant democratic donkey at the bottom of the page, and the word "Sunday at church," in the first sentence of the first post.

Let me precursor the rest of this by saying this: I hate politics, I hate tree hugging hippies who don't understand that inequality is inherent to life, and I definately hate people who take it upon themselves to make me feel guilty for being nothing more than white. I don't hate this blog, though.

The template is fairly bare bones and it's fairly well organized, even if the sidebar seems to go on for fucking EVER! Seriously, it's longer than the actual content. I'm also not sure why the archives are at the bottom of the content area, and, while we're talking about things that make you go "zuh?" I'm kind of at a loss for why there's a ton of shit in the content area that isn't content immediately proceeding the oddly placed archives. But take notes, people. Look at the links at the top? You see that? That is orgasmically exemplary. Don't put all your smut on the main page, tuck it away into handy-dandy little links!

The content is much better than the template. I thought it was going to be this flaming fest of "Democrats RULE!" but it's not. Not entirely, at least. I will admit that I didn't read very much of the content on account of being insanely lazy due to my vacation that starts promptly on Thursday morning. What I did read, though, was good. It's not insanely political, and it asks pressing questions like "Why don't little girls fart?" and then answers them with the pure, unadulterated truth-"They don't have assholes until they are married."

A more truthful statement has yet to be made.

The verdict?

I give it for an overall well organized template and pretty good template.

And don't think I'm going to let the randomly placed archive and shitloads of shit after the content ends. For that you get a


  1. Quick question, my blog isn't on the to-do list anymore. Does that mean it's been assigned or does that mean I'm off the list for some reason?

  2. It means you've been assigned to someone. I figure it's easier to manage the list that way.

    I may have to rethink that though.

  3. Kitty Kat!
    Hey, thanks for the tips. I've already started cleaning up the shit that makes you go Zuh! Have a great vacation! ...and don't worry. I won't tell anybody you are white.

  4. How stoked are you for a little vacation? I'm so going to pawn you. MUHAHA! You're going down....on some Israeli dude!


Grow a pair.