Monday, June 09, 2008

[Insert Throwaway Gag-Title Here]


Another blog written by a lesbian home-schooler with a PhD in molecular-biology? Christ on a cartwheel, when I saw Doc’s blog I almost spit out a piece of white-tiger steak into my dodo-bird’s milk.

Yes, and though the above is slight exaggeration, this is not: Doc is one of the most unique individuals I’ve come across during my time climbing through these interwebs, and I am in possession of the belief that she is motherfucking fabulous...and if someone wants to take that literally, well, just know that I have no extra information regarding her carnal-prowess.

These are "Sunrise Rants", so keep that in mind whilst perusing Doc’s Domain - home-schooling philosophies/discussions dominate a lot of the writing, and religion, the juiciest of juicy topics, makes multiple appearances, once while Doc was introducing me to the epithet "theistard", and unless you’re an enemy of language, that is a gift that keeps on giving.

There is a problem, though, and it goes much deeper than the sheep in the header (which, actually, I quite like, but I digress), and the problem is this: the posts are thick. I read through a prodigious amount of them and looked up to find that I was only as far back as this past February: 4 posts on May 28th, 3 on April 30th, 2 of those longer than a flight to Pluto while sitting in a dentist’s office.

You almost defeated me with your proficiency, Doc, but I managed to maintain my professional integrity, despite the obvious and myriad appearances to the contrary.

I had trouble grabbing a foothold, and though a huge amount of the blame for that lies with my lack of focus and attention to detail, I tend to gravitate to posts such as this, the little snippet of life with a humourous bent...but if nitpicking was roast beef, I’d be eating a pretty big hoagie right now, wouldn’t I?



Yes, Doc, if you were the boastful type, you could tell people that you won the crown...but, please, save yourself from the emotional letdown that tomorrow will bring; remember that humility saves lives, and that being Doc makes you a dangerous, dangerous woman.

24 comments:

  1. I was waiting for this review, and it was perfect! There isn't really a lengthy post to be made about this blog, in my opinion, because it just absolutely rocks. I loved it from the beginning, and I love it enough to not care how long the posts get.

    Finding these jewels are the reason I'm addicted to this site. Doc is awesome, and I fucking love her, too.

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  2. Yeah, I fucking love her, too. She is pretty damn amazing and may just make me a convert to lesbianism.

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  3. Aw shucks. You guys are just so. You know. Gee whillikers, if I were a cyber hugger, you all'd be the firstest.

    I'll digest this after I've had some coffee.

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  4. I, also, was pondering a switch to lesbianism. Sure, you mightn't be able to tell, but *I* would know...

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  5. I would like to, for no sneaky reason whatsoever, express my love for Calamity...these feelings are well known, and the declaration of such, in such a public forum no less, has absolutely nothing at all to do with the fact that I might have reviewed the wrong blog.

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  6. Oh no! You reviewed Calamity's blog!? Now she won't get the really cool easy blog. Unless there are two of them this week.

    If she kicks your ass, I want to watch.

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  7. Jubblies, I was all set to forgive you, but not I'm not so sure. I just saw what you left me with. Sigh.

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  8. I haven't seen it yet, so just know, before you send a bag of flaming snakes to my house, that I didn't do it on purpose...and that I love you.

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  9. Well wait - would my review have been better, or worse if the correct reviewer had reviewed it?

    And as for my long posts - yeah. Sometimes. But I have a lot to say. About some stuff.

    What is a blog, really? It's a narcissistic vehicle people use to showcase themselves and gather affirmations. I write for myself. I am (not really) embarrassed to say that I often go back and read my own archives, constantly amazed at just how cool I really am.

    Sometimes I should let a subject go sooner than I do. I like to think of it as "tenacious".

    Sometimes I'm just stupid.

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  10. It probably would have made more sense had Calamity done it because she's awesome and less prone to the wild similes and abject-craziness that I tend to employ, but I would wager that the feeling about the blog is the same.

    Remember, I said wager: I'm already in enough hot water w/Calamity without talking FOR her, too.

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  11. When I clicked over to this from the list of impending doom you could see this was good stuff.

    Very individual, very unique and a great identity.

    and fuck me if this is a woman with no fucking sperm to hand with 4 kids!...doc, we need to talk.

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  12. My ex gf had extremely potent saliva.

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  13. Has she ever been to Europe?

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  14. First generation Greek. Hairy, but hot.

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  15. Would she be willing to spit on my wife?

    I'd keep her in feta for a month if it worked.

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  16. Well, I can ask her. She reads this stuff, so maybe she'll answer for herself.

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  17. All I'm saying is that Doc is obviously the shit. Really.

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  18. "the shit". I live on a farm. 'Round here, that ain't a compliment.

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  19. Touche. How about, "All I'm saying is the kind of person that bedazzles farm shit and neighborhood water plants without any of that glitter crap is the kind of person that we need more of."

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  20. How about "I love the blog so much, I want to move to the farm, shovel shit, and make Doc a sandwich. Or whatever."

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  21. Professor Booty6/10/2008 5:38 AM

    Of the lesbian homeschool bloggers we've seen lately, Doc is the best. I dig her, but it could be a MolBio thang.

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  22. Doc, I love your blog so much that I'd move to the farm, shovel shit, and make you a sandwich... if you could teach me to write like you and make me really good iced tea.

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  23. Anything for you dear, but be forewarned, ice tea in oregon comes in powdered form, or in single serve bottles with expensive names like tao-zing.

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Grow a pair.