Friday, May 22, 2009

Stuck Between A Punk And A Hard Place

Askers, please welcome a new reviewer to the team: Vivian VonDoom. You can read more about her here. - Love Bites

Let's keep today's review short and sweet. It's Friday and it's a holiday weekend. We're all feeling easy and relaxed.

It's known in my small circle that I have a soft spot in my heart for a few things. My soft spot things include: zombies, hobos, teenage werewolves and punks. Churchpunkmom, I now have a soft spot in my heart for you too.

Unfortunately, even this tender heart place can't ignore the fact that your blog seems to be suffering through an identity crisis.

Let me ask you, do you want to be this or this? Frankly, I prefer this but I'm not all anti-mommy blogger. I'm not a big fan of memes or awards. I think the concept of Wordless Wednesdays are fine, but you can do so much more. You are a writer at heart but you are also a mother, and believe it or not? These two things CAN be combined. And, combined well. You can be proud of your children and the every day things that make up your life. You know what else you can do? You can write about it. But, if you do, please write about it well. REALLY write about it, instead of taking us on gushing, rambling rides through the mundane.

Let me give you an example of a blogger that I think you would enjoy and who embodies what I feel like you could really be. Here you go, thank me now. Thank me again later. She talks about her daily life, her little boy and she posts pictures. She does it all in a way that you really feel her in every post that she puts up. It's all her, all the time.

Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction is not going to find its way onto my Reader anytime soon. My honest nature is going to force me to tell you that I was bored. Really, very bored. So bored in fact, that while I was taking notes on your blog, my notepad ended up looking very much like your template. Which is bad ass, minus all the badges, buttons and bullshit. However, I think if you could just figure out what you want your blog to be, then we'd have a whole new ball game.

I hate to give you a Meh, but what choice do I have?

What I'd rather give you is an "In Treatment".

You're not quite sure of who you are or what you are doing in that space, but with some work and understanding you can kick some major ass.


  1. Thank you for your review!

    and yes, bit of an identity crisis here. ;)

    I'd go into more detail about how I try to steer clear of the mommy blogger and giveaway crap and focus more on writing.. but then, I guess you already figured that out.

    Thanks espcially for the props on my design, my awesome man did that for me.. though, yes, I'm still working on cleaning my shit off his masterpiece.. heh.

    You guys are awesome! Thank you!

  2. Vivian VonDoom? I pink fluffy heart you.

  3. I love you too, you Dirty Pirate Hooker.

  4. Love the "Dr.Paul Weston" photo. I'd love him to analyze me. The review was great also.

  5. *swoon* oh, and your review kicked ass too.

  6. It's probably a sign of the end of the world that I'm being used as an example of anything anyone should aspire to.

    Of course, I've come a long way since the Myspace blog I used to write.

    Oh yeah. I just admitted that.

    And clearly that is proof that improvement is always possible.

    Thanks for the ego boost, VV. You're tits.

  7. OOOOHHHH - You liked the design!!!

    I think your review was fair - I think I know ChurchPunkMom pretty well and I agree with you, her site does have an identity crisis and while I see a place for contests and some off beat items, her main content should be her writing.

    I am glad you could review it.


  8. I found the background distracting, not to mention it made it nearly impossible to see the older/newer post links at the bottom (and on a blog with a two posts per page, your readers will use those links a lot).

    The content was good when it was honest. You lost me on some of the sillier/whimsical stuff.

  9. Church punk mom, tell web designer dad to look at his padding in your content column and had some padding as follows: 10px 10px 10px 10px. Ditto your far right column, the padding on that one is all buggered. Any chance you could talk him into merging columns 2 and 3 into a single column (so you'd have a 2 column blog instead of a 3 column blog)? Then, you could widen your main column and put greater emphasis on your writing. And, fix the padding that makes it harder to read. Your blog needs white space around the text. All of it.

  10. Spot on review, Viv.

    I wanted to like this blog very much -- great name, interesting person, pretty design. But, yeah, a bit boring really.

    As for the design, although I do like it, I'd get rid of all the blinking doodads and extra crap and drop it down to 2 columns. I think it would be much cleaner, focusing more on the writing.

  11. What LB said. I like where your design was heading, but it just kind of got all over the place. Needs some tidying.

  12. Vivian VonDoom5/22/2009 12:36 PM

    I knew they'd get you for the three-columns and they are right. It's really cluttered on the right side of your page.

  13. Vivian VonDoom5/22/2009 12:43 PM

    PS - I felt a little bold creating my own rating on my first go round.

  14. Dude. I was impressed with the rating creation. I don't think I've ever done that.

  15. @Sci-Fi Dad, but doesn't the distraction aid with the boredom?? ;) I agree about the 'older/newer post' link. We need to fix that (or at least put more posts per page?).

    @LB, Calamity, VVD
    I admit, the three columns was my idea and it was partly so I could keep some of the buttony crap (I did at least move my awards to a different page, but I think that wasn't enough). I think you're right though, the page feels cramped and cluttered with the three columns and we should merge them. That would also make it easier to put 3 or 4 posts per page without it being unbalance having the content stretch a mile beyond the.. other stuff.

  16. And Vivian, I didn't realize you were a new reviewer! I'm so honored to be your first. ;) You're awesome. And you invented rating was my favorite part. :)

  17. Vivian VonDoom5/22/2009 12:53 PM

    Awww, shucks. You actually made me blush and kick some imaginary dirt.

  18. Even though I sounded like a doofus and said 'you' instead of 'your'? Oops.

    I love imaginary dirt. I never have to clean it up.

  19. Vivian - does your spouse wear a mask and a cape and chase 4 blue uniformed freaks?

  20. Wow, that WAS ballsy of Viv to create her own new rating while she was having her cherry broken.

    Maybe we're just cutting you some slack because you're new.

  21. WOO! Check out the new reviewer. Hott-tot-tot-hotty.

  22. I can't decide if she's flipping us off in that picture, or if that's just more alcohol. Knowing Vivian, it could go either way.

  23. Tasty. Oh, and I liked the review as well.

  24. I like her name. It's pretty and scary at the same time. Also, it reminds me of Vivian Darkbloom from Lolita.


Grow a pair.