Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Reluctant Reviewer Desperately Seeking... Anything

I have been remiss in my blog reviewing duties and for that I apologize, but I'm not going to lie. The conflict and drama involved in this process gets to me. Although the URL clearly shows that this is not a tea party hosted in your grandmother's lovely garden, folks still get all up in arms when a spanking is deservedly served. This is perplexing. Are you confused? Do you not know where it is that you have submitted your blog to be reviewed?

I think you and I both know that, yes, you do know whose hands you've placed your sweet little blog into. Your hope was that we would think that you are as awesome as YOU wholeheartedly believe you are. This causes you to be unjustifiably upset when you and your writing styles are ripped to pieces.

To further push me away, it seems that one of our lovely readers outed me and my identity to someone that I was to review. I hope that this was done with a purpose that was for good and not evil, because I found it disheartening.

So it is with all of this drama in my thoughts that I stepped away from AAYSR. And, it is here today that I step forward again to review, in hopes that the drama will stay within the level that is appropriate and intended. We love the drama, it's just that you all take it so darned personally. You can only imagine my hesitation when I was assigned today's blog. I think we all remember this.


But it is my promise and intention that I will not pull any punches or act as a puss cookie might while conducting this review. Integrity... I have it. Mostly.

So let's get down to business. I'll start with the "new first impression" that I got as I pushed past transgressions out of my mind, clicked onto The Reluctant Housewife and laid my eyes upon the design. Melanie has obviously put a lot into this design and I love the DIY blog designer. There is really good intention behind the design and she has it well organized. I like the look she was going for but somehow feel like it fell short. The font in the header is not going to be getting a fan club organized by little ol' me anytime soon. And while there is an extreme amount of organization in the navigation, the overall feel is still chaotic and cluttered.

I trust that this will fall into "personal preference" and this is mine. It just falls short of what I think you were trying to achieve, but I love the retro feel.

Melanie's writing feels all sorts of proper to me. I felt like I was wearing cardboard panties the entire time I read. Not entirely unpleasant, really, quite functional, but lacking in appeal and zest. However, I don't hate it. She writes well, it's just all very... meh.

You can stop groaning right now. Let me clarify. If Melanie was writing about something, anything that held my interest or that provoked my thoughts, then her style of writing would be fantastic. Her subject matter would do all the "excite me, thrill me" work. However, while I relate to her subject matter, I'm uninterested. Just as her title suggests, she is indeed a housewife and while she hates that title, she has wrapped her blog right around it.

In all honesty how am I supposed to get behind someone who spells out "shit" like this? Or comedic stylings such as this? And, isn't this all sorts of riveting?

What I'm saying here is that we have a perfectly lovely blog. There is nothing exciting, nothing that is going to crinkle up those cardboard panties. And quite honestly, I could have stuck my hand into the big ol' pot that is the internet and pulled out a blog just like this one hundreds, probably thousands of times over.

I guess what I'm saying is that your "meh" is polished is but, good lord, it's still just:

This is all sorts of really, we have to say this again? Because I know that we have told you again and again that you can be a mommy blogger, just be an interesting one, puhlease. Melanie, you've been reading here long enough to know better.

I should throw this in though. If you want to read about other people's kids and every little nuance of their farts and drooling, then Melanie isn't horrible. You know, minus the reviews.


  1. I kind of wanted to like this one. I'm not sure why. Maybe because I want to like most of them. But you're so right. It's just... meh.

    I mean, she seems nice enough, the design is kind of cute, the writing isn't terrible, but I just didn't connect. That might be because I'm so very, very far from her target audience (or at least what I perceive to be her target audience). Or it might be because she's just failed to bring me in. It's kind of stilted and here's what we did today.

  2. It's stilted and 'here's what we did today'? Shit. Kill me now.

    Well... you said my writing wasn't horrible. I'll take it.

    No dramatic intentions... Thanks for the review.

  3. To be completely fair, I got called away in the middle of reading, so I only got to about, say, 8 posts.

  4. Review me! Please!! I just started my blog about 6 weeks ago. Some posts are better then others. I want to improve. I'd love to hear what you have to say.

  5. Reluctant Housewife


  6. VV,
    It's good to have you back. I am a million miles from RH's target and have to say that I'm just not interested. But then, I'm just not interested in reading Tolstoy right now either. It's no reflection on her. I will say that the '50's image coupled with the Jane Austen-esque type don't work. She could do a little research and find a type suitable to the era she portrays.

    One more thing--she has nine blog awards. I don't have any. *sigh*

  7. hereinfranklin: those awards are just memes... friendly, but they don't mean much. You're welcome to award yourself any of the awards I have.

    I think your advice about the font in my header is excellent. I'm going to look into it. Thank you.

    Gap: dig?

  8. Gah--"doesn't work," not don't. Ugh...

  9. Melanie,

    Dig means...reach deeper inside of you. Be more real, be more true, be more brave, be more blunt, be more you.

    I think you can. You just aren't, yet.

  10. Isnt this one of the women who got her panties all knotted up when some other mommy blogger was reviewed? I could be wrong....but I dont think I am.

  11. I'm pretty sure she's been reviewed before, right?

    On a baby making note, thank you LB, Gap and everyone else for the congrats. We're incubating the Pirate Ghost and we'll keep you all updated.

  12. Y'all, click on Viv's links up there. She links to the meltdown that makes the Housewife seem familiar. This is her first review, though.

  13. Sarah, yep that's me. Loud and proud... or something.

    LB - in my mind I am being real and true and me. I don't have it in me to be blunt, I'm too nice.

  14. Hereinfranklin doesn't have any awards? What is wrong with the internet gods? I'm going to have to invent an award for you, HIF.

  15. Why isn't Hooker commenting here anymore, ky? why why why why.

    Hated Ray but love Ray, hated Chris; good riddance to thee.

  16. Franklin: what do you mean you don't have any awards?!!! You have a fucking "I fucking Love You!"

    What more can you want!



  17. Yeah, Key. I miss hooker too.

  18. Ok, thought so.

    Oh, and congrats to you Ghost! Pretty awesome.

  19. Blues and Ellie--obviously my "ironic" tone didnt translate from my head to the page. But thanks for the love. :)

  20. could be that Im just numb from that glass of red i just sucked down but i tried to read 4 different posts and they all lost my interest after 3 to 5 sentences.

    guess I need a little "porn" to wake me up and keep me going.

  21. The question isn't length of absense. THAT IS CLEARLY AND PAINFULLY OBVIOUS.

    I just want to know why? and if you plan on really staying.

    You know, some of us miss you.

  22. Thanks Gap! I've just been super busy with my new job. But the busy season is coming to an end and we're finally slowing down a little, so I have some free time during the day to fuck around! Yay!

  23. k. I'm happy as is long as your remarkable absence is simply a matter of priority.

    How is your handsome delicious coon?

  24. WHAT????

    No.......... no no no no. Really??


Grow a pair.